“Well, the situation is pretty dire here. Our recommendation is all of our clients to commit their entire holdings into canned food and shotguns.” This nugget of wise counsel comes from the Brain Gremlin – a scientifically altered, articulate, spectacled member of the oozy monster mob that overruns Manhattan’s ultra-modern Clamp Tower skyscraper in filmmaker Joe Dante’s zany follow-up Gremlins 2: The New Batch. At first glance, it’s merely an financial suggestion from one monster to another. But, oddly enough, it’s also pretty solid life guidance. Honestly, consider my perspective.
When situations deteriorate, the most counterproductive action you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin grasps this. In fact, the majority of the dentally-gifted beasts that occupy Dante’s wild 1990 film (arguably his best) possess the same wry, meta funny bone regarding the hazy boundary separating everyday life and unadulterated chaos. It’s a single component of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that ensures my return – and as I age, it’s the underlying idea that echoes the loudest.
Naturally, my connection with this movie did not begin on such an deeply thoughtful note. Growing up, we were limited to a few scratched-up video tapes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its follow-up, the latter housed in a bulky previously-rented case probably bought from an off-brand video shop and boasting grimacing beasts on its knackered cover. I was instantly captivated and these films quickly proceeded inserting themselves inside my young, susceptible psyche. After that point, they became an practically routine part of my youthful watching schedule.
Dante’s original commonly garners all the praise, thanks mostly because of its reputation as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and don’t get me wrong, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. Nevertheless, its successor seldom receives the same level of high regard, which feels unjust. As a kid, I’d never miss an opportunity to watch Gremlins 2. During sunny school summer breaks, I’d retreat into the house and pop it in. When I obtained my very own TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Gradually, it ingrained itself in my mental framework. If my parents observed this fixation, they appeared unbothered.
As I matured, new understandings enriched frequent screenings, heightening the enjoyment of watching diminutive verdant beasts gleefully trash a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused real estate tycoon and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was based squarely upon the eventual commander-in-chief Donald Trump, with his ginger staff member Marla (Haviland Morris) referencing his second wife Marla Maples. Luckily, Clamp has more heart than his actual-world equivalent.
The “end of civilisation” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was based on a genuine “Doomsday” video commissioned by the CNN boss Ted Turner in case the world really ended. I noticed how Dante took extra pains to film alternate cuts of a self-aware scene where Gremlins take over the actual feature in progress. One for cinemas, a separate one for tape and broadcast, each delivering a smirking slice of fourth-wall-breaking cultural alchemy before the term was even a thing.
While it was creature designer Rick Baker’s wonderfully grotesque creatures that captured my attention as a child, this deeper gold held my interest as an adult. Ultimately, I even spoke to Dante about it myself and he had no reservations informing me he made the movie with the express purpose of ridiculing those who loved its silly-yet-sincere predecessor and wanted more. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he gleefully confessed. This cartoonish rebelliousness and commitment to not take his sequel as solemnly as his Warner Bros bosses evidently expected, only made me love it even more.
When I endured a abrupt familial death earlier this year, I was surprised to find that, during my heightest mourning, all I desired to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Strange, isn’t it? Perhaps not. The comforting familiarity it provided was essential to thin out my mind’s grief morass – but the perspectives it had bestowed upon me as an adult were similarly beneficial.
Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s some things in life you just can’t control. Dante is aware of it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to emulate them: accept the turmoil, commit your entire being into canned food and shotguns and try not to view the world with undue solemnity.
It’s powerful existential guidance from a highly unexpected fountain – and it’s the reason Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my comfort movie.
Lina is a seasoned casino reviewer with over a decade of experience in the gambling industry.